Walking By Faith

Sometimes encouragement comes in the form of rebuke. Nearly always, promises come with instructions. Some of the best Words I have ever received from the Lord have come through chastisement. The Lord’s ways are higher than our ways; His thoughts are far above our thoughts, and He chastens whom He loves. I open a page of my journal to you, dear reader, simply because He tells me to. I do not date it, because the message it brings is timeless. May it help someone along the Way:

And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses. (Mark 11:25-26)

Jesse Duplantis is one of my favorite preachers. He says that my mountain isn’t going anywhere no matter how much I speak to it if I am not clean from unforgiveness when I pray. He says that someone may have made me stumble for years, but that I shouldn’t let them string me along for the rest of my life. I shouldn’t let them keep me from getting what I need from God. I have to remember that unless I release them, my faith will not work. He said that if the same old problem keeps coming up, it’s time to check on my love walk; I should look for unforgiveness so that I can have whatsoever I say, exercising love with my faith – knowing that love and faith work together for good results. (Galatians 5:6)

As I pondered these words from Brother Jesse, and as I began to pray, Lord you caused me to see that just as my getting aggravated or angry and reacting in the flesh rather than the Spirit with my children actually empowers them to manipulate me, having just the opposite of the desired effect in their behavior as I would like and could obtain through the Spirit – and just like I actually empower temptation to become full-blown sin in my life when I allow carnal attributes such as laziness, fear of man, fear of failure, unbelief or selfishness to keep me from waging war against negative thoughts with the Word decreed aloud in a given situation – so too do I actually empower people in my life to continue to hurt me through my own unforgiveness. These people are usually simply sinners who are doing what is natural to them – sinning. If they are born again, then they are often carnal themselves, and I know enough that I should not be waging carnal battles. Through my internalizing the pain and making it a personal and fleshly battle rather than remembering that my war is not against flesh and blood, (Eph. 6:12) I then empower the enemy (whom at that point, because of high emotions, I have often failed to even recognize or acknowledge) to trounce all over me.

You showed me further that unforgiveness finds its roots in selfishness, and in fear. You asked me Lord, “Why is it that you were able to continually forgive 10 months of separation from your children and walk in love when your girls were wrenched from you before, but you do not find it so easy to forgive and walk in love now, when it is only a matter of separation over one holiday weekend? Is it not a much smaller matter? What is the difference?”

Of course, the Lord knew, but He has a way of making me come up with my own answers and bringing them before Him so that He may show me my own faulty reasoning. “Well Lord,” I began, “Back then I knew it was You. I knew You had allowed it, that somehow it was for my good, and that You would rectify it in Your time.”

“So it was me who allowed it then, but someone somewhere is operating outside of my sovereignty presently? Or is it that you trusted Me then, and I have done something to cause you to lose faith and fail to trust me now?”

“Oh NO, Lord! I mean, well… I don’t know exactly what’s different… um… I guess it’s because of all of the things she just keeps right on doing! She knows it hurts me and she keeps on doing whatever she can just to spite me! Intentionally I’d guess – to hurt me and not for the sake of the children’s welfare! I’m tired of it Lord. It’s been too long and it’s one thing after another… my endurance is dried up I think!”

“What would you have me to do?”

“Well, You could save her so she’d be easier to deal with God… that would be a good start.”
“Just as I was in control before, so I am in control now. Is my timing not perfect? Shall I save her for your selfish gain or for her soul’s sake? Tell me, in dealing with my people, and in saving this one child, how shall I do it?”

“Oh God, that’s not what I meant to say! Eeeew! Am I really that bad?”

“Daughter, tell me how to save this woman.”

“Well, just do whatever it takes Lord!” (There! That sounded spiritual… and it worked in other instances…)

“And just what exactly will it take, Daughter?”

“Um… well, I don’t guess I know that part Father.”

“No, I don’t guess you do. You must trust Me. I will save her, but not for your comfort. I will open her eyes in My perfect time and I will answer the prayers of your children and the prayers that you had once prayed for her in faith believing. You were able to go through then, to endure, because you were focused on Me. You saw Me. You spoke My Word. You believed. No matter the length or ferocity of battle, no matter the number of battles in a war, I Am Captain of the Host, Your Victory. I know what I am doing. You can be part of the problem or part of the solution. It is your choice. Let go all last vestige of bitterness daughter. It does not become you, neither is it in keeping with what you know or who you are. Empower yourself rather than empowering your enemy and choose love.”


Courtesy of: Evangelist K. S. Simpson
FaithWalk International Ministries, Inc.